In Our Spare Time
by paintedallup
Summary: Heroes, The Heroes find out about the internet. Be grateful I rarely ever write any crackfics, and this my friends is one!


Claire: Wheres1My2Toe?3

Sylar: Brainsandcheese

Elle: Mylittleponycanbite

Hiro: Yattabithes

Peter: Callmeemo

Nathan: IlovePeter

Niki/Jessica: Jessicaisabitch/Nikiisabitch

Molly: Iseeyou:)

Matt: Mindreader

Micah: Mollylover

Isaac: Deadmanpainting

Simone: Reallydeadbitch

Claude: Yourallwankers

Maya: Syarisminebitches!

Adam: Eviljustgotsexy

H.R.G: Morallygray

Zach: I'mstillhere

West: Stalkmestalkyou

Mohinder: I'llgogayforsylar/ I'llgogayformatt

Brainsandcheese: sighed on

Yattabihes: sighed on

7:50 PM:

Brainsandcheese: Hello?

Yattabihes: HELLO! :!!

Brainsandcheese: …?

Yattabihes: I like cheese, do you? Cheese and Waffles, drool

Brainsandcheese: logged off

Yattabihes: :( :(

Yattabihes: logged off

8:00 PM:

Brainsandcheese: sighed on

Mylittleponycanbite: sighed on

Brainsandcheese: Did you run into the overly happy cheese guy, bitch?

Mylittleponycanbite: Yes, but call me bitch one more time….lights up fingers

Brainsandcheese: Come on, El! It's just what I call all of my girlfriends, get over it.

Mylittleponycanbite: Girlfriends? I'm your first real girlfriend, ever! Loser.

Brainsandcheese: Bitch.

Mylittleponycanbite: logged off

Brainsandcheese: …Elle? Hello? Shit, she's coming to get me I just know it!

Yattabihes: sighed on

Yattabihes: CHEESE!!

Brainsandcheese: rips open head and eats brain with a teaspoon

Yattabihes: meep

Yattabihes: logged off

Brainsandcheese: hehe

Brainsandcheese: logged off

8:30:

Callmeemo: sighed on

Wheres1My2Toe?3: sighed on

IlovePeter: sighed on

Callmemo: :( tear

Wheres1My2Toe?3: Peter? What's wrong? OMG are you having another episode?! Put the razors away! PUT THEM AWAY!

Callmeemo: …. Whoa, settle down Claire, I have no razors or any other sharp objects near me, OK? You really are Nathan's daughter.

Wheres1My2Toe?3: Ok, SORRY! What happened, did you and Nathan have another love spat?

Callmeemo: No…yes.

Wheres1My2Toe?3: Aww…baby tell me all about it.

Callmeemo: tear I wanted to finally step up and tell the world about us, starting with mom and he totally freaked out.

Wheres1My2Toe?3: That's Nathan 100.

Callmeemo: We fought and he called me a gay cutting emo with bad hair. That might be true but I don't want to hear it! Plus he's gay too! Or did he forget that?

IlovePeter: I didn't forget, Pete.

Callmeemo: Nathan!

Wheres1My2Toe?3: Hey Nathan, I'll just be on my way so you two can kiss and make up!

Wheres1My2Toe?3: logged off

IlovePeter: I miss you, come home. Mom's out ;)

Callmeemo: No.

IlovePeter: Pete…

Callmeemo: I said no. I'm still mad at you, plus you can't get me back that quick.

IlovePeter: Yes I can, plus did you see my username, it's just for you. :)

Callmeemo: I'm coming home.

Callmeemo: logged off

IlovePeter: Told you so!

IlovePeter: logged off

9:00

Wheres1My2Toe?3: sighed on

Brainsandcheese: sighed on

Wheres1My2Toe?3: Sylar?

Brainsandcheese: Claire-bear, isn't it past your bed time?

Wheres1My2Toe?3: Very funny, but I'm not here to talk about me but you and my sister.

Brainsandcheese: Elle? Why? We're fine.

Wheres1My2Toe?3: Fine? Fine! She just told me that you called her a bitch, that it's over and she wants to burn you to a crisp and feed you to Adam.

Brainsandcheese: 00 Can I fix it?

Wheres1My2Toe?3: She said 'the only way he could ever fix it was if he grows wings out of his ass and flew to the moon.' I think that means no.

Brainsandcheese: That's just great, why the hell did she have to go and ruin it?

Wheres1My2Toe?3: …I think you ruined it the moment you started calling her bitch, that's a big no-no.

Brainsandcheese: Umm… do you want to go out? I love breaking the law :))

Wheres1My2Toe?3: …eww…just eww.

Wheres1My2Toe?3: logged off

Brainsandcheese: tear! I mean grr Elle, yes grr!

Brainsandcheese: logged off

6:00 am:

Reallydeadbitch: sighed on

Deadmanpainting: sighed on

Callmeemo: sighed on

Callmeemo: Ummm….hello?

Deadmanpainting: Hhheeelllooo ppeetteerr….whhhoooooo

Callmeemo: Is that you again, Isaac?

Deadmanpainting: Damn, how did you guess?

Callmeemo: You used the same username as last time.

Deadmanpainting: Oh.

Reallydeadbitch: Do you love me Peter/Isaac?

Callmeemo: No.

Deadmanpainting: No.

Reallydeadbitch: :( You so do. Everyone does!

Reallydeadbitch: blocked by Callmeemo and Deadmanpainting

Callmeemo: That's better.

Deadmanpainting: Did you kill Sylar yet?

Callmeemo: You asked me that yesterday and no not yet.

Deadmanpainting: Pansy, can't you do anything right. ….hey why is my nose bleeding, what the hell are you doing!

Callmeemo: What me? ….hehehe.

Deadmanpainting: Sicko

Callmeemo: logged off

Deadmanpainting: logged off

7:00 PM

Deadmanpainting: sighed on

Brainsandcheese: sighed on

Deadmanpainting: Is that you Sylar?

Brainsandcheese: Oh how could you guess? sarcasm and you must be Isaac.

Deadmanpainting: how did you guess? no sarcasm

Brainsandcheese: ?

Brainsandcheese: logged off

Deadmanpainting: logged off

12:00 PM

Jessicaisabitch: sighed on

Brainsandcheese: sighed on

Brainsandcheese: snicker Nice username, Jessica-dear.

Jessicaisabitch: Shut the hell up, cheesehead.

Jessicaisabitch: changed her username to Nikiisabitch.

Brainsandcheese: Much, much better, girly.

Nikiisabitch: Will you shut up or do I have to call you cheesehead again, cheesehead?

Brainsandcheese: A tad bit angry are we? Niki keep you locked up all day long?

Nikiisabitch: Yes, did anyone try to kill you today?

Brainsandcheese: ….Yes.

Nikiisabitch: How many?

Brainsandcheese: Three.

Nikiisabitch has changed her user name to Jessicaisabitch.

Jessicaisabitch: Who the hell gave you this address, Sylar?!

Brainsandcheese: Ummm…you, I mean Jessica. Goodbye!

Brainsandcheese: logged off

Jessicaisabitch: blocked Brainsandcheese

Jessicaisabitch: logged off

4:00 PM:

Mollylover: sighed on

Iseeyou: sighed on

Iseeyou: Hello? Micah is that you?

Mollylover: Yeah, Hi Molly!

Iseeyou: You have a really weird username, 00

Mollylover: Ummm….hahaha it's a joke! Funny, huh?

Iseeyou: Ummm…ok. How's umm life?

Mollylover: Weird, but isn't it always?

Iseeyou: Oh yes, but in between getting kidnapped by Sylar and fighting the nightmare man, Mohinder and Matt find time to be my two daddies. How are Niki and Dl?

Mollylover: Dead.

Iseeyou: …Oh. Sorry.

Iseeyou: Mohinder's back with his new girlfriend the one that shoots lightning out of her finger tips, well bye!

Iseeyou: logged off

Mollylover: : tear

Mollylover: logged off

9:00 PM:

Sylarisminebitches: sighed on

Brainsandcheese: sighed on

Mylittleponycanbite: sighed on

Sylarisminebitches: Sylar! Where have you been?! I missed you so, so much! Come home!

Brainsandcheese: Maya? Ummm…didn't I shoot you and say I wanted to eat your brains the last time we were together?

Sylarisminebitches: So? I still love you, teddy-bear!

Brainsandcheese: ? teddy-bear?

Mylittleponycanbite: And what is this? You and Maya? grr

Brainsandcheese: Elle, baby! It's not what you think! She's just some girl I seduced last year to get her power, and now she's all puppy-love for me, it's not my fault.

Sylarisminebitches: Hey! He's mine, read the username bitch.

Brainsandcheese: Damn Maya! hides

Sylarisminebitches: Oh! Don't hide, baby!!

Mylittleponycanbite: Baby? BABY! Sylar, I'll be over in an hour, I have a little bitch to fry.

Brainsandcheese: Does that mean we're back together?

Mylittleponycanbite: Oh HELL yes.

Brainsandcheese: Then fry away!!

Mylittleponycanbite: logged off

Brainsandcheese: logged off

Sylarisminebitches: gulp

Sylarisminebitches: logged off

4:00 AM:

Mylittleponycanbite: sighed on

Brainsandcheese: sighed on

Brainsandcheese: yawn Why so early Elle? What's wrong and why can't you use the damn phone?

Mylittleponycanbite: Phone shorted out and Mohinder is coming to kill you. Wrong enough?

Brainsandcheese: ? Really? What did I do this time?

Mylittleponycanbite: Ummm…stole your girlfriend back from him. Hehe.

Brainsandcheese: What the hell! You hooked up with Mohinder after one freaking day apart? Mohinder?! Mr. Rainbow shirts?

Eviljustgotsexy: sighed on

Eviljustgotsexy: Yeah, why him, Elle? Why not me? smirk

Mylittleponycanbite: is not amused Adam, this is a private chatroom, who invited you? Oh and by the way, who the hell let you out of your coffin?

Sylar, I was angry, and I did something rash, just like you did asking out my younger sister!

Brainsandcheese: It was a joke!

Eviljustgotsexy poked Brainsandcheese and kissed Mylittleponycanbite.

Brainsandcheese: Stop kissing my girlfriend and poking me. I'm having a craving for brain, yours!

Eviljustgotsexy: As if, Sylar-boy. Anyway I myself asked the little red cheerleader out and of course she said yes.

Mylittleponycanbite: Liar, liar pants on fire! I know for a fact that little Claire said hell no and called you creepy, which you are.

Eviljustgotsexy: frown I'm not creepy! Hell, your sleeping with the freaking Boogieman!

Brainsandcheese: Yes she is! :)

Mylittleponycanbite: Yes I am! :)

Eviljustgotsexy sent Mylittleponycanbite a private message.

Eviljustgotsexy: Elle! Come on, baby. You can have so much more fun with me! Run away with me.

Mylittleponycanbite: NO. Frak you!

Eviljustsexy: ?

Eviljustgotsexy: blocked by Mylittleponycanbite and Brainsandcheese

Brainsandcheese: Finally where were we? Oh never mind, Mohinder's at my door; I'll kill him and leave you his shirt. Kisses.

Mylittleponycanbite: Kisses, have fun!

Brainsandcheese: logged off

Mylittleponycanbite: logged off

5:00 PM:

Callmeemo: sighed off

Yourallwankers: sighed off

Morallygray: sighed off

Yourallwankers: YOU!

Callmeemo: YOU!

Morallygray: Who?

Yourallwankers: I know it's you Noah, not that hard to figure out. You tried to kill me you son of a bitch!

Callmeemo: He did?

Yourallwankers: PETER! Get the hell out! This has nothing to do with you!

Morallygray: The boy can stay if he wants, Claude. He is a grown man.

Callmeemo: But you just called me a boy.

Morallygray: I meant man.

Yourallwankers: You mother-

Iseeyou: Hello Uncle Noah, what are you talking about?

Morallygray: M-molly? Why are you on the computer honey? Get off and let the adults talk. :)

Iseeyou:

You tried to kill Mohinder, Uncle Noah! Claude, he's at James Street in LA, have fun. Bye!

Morallygray: …

Yourallwankers: logged off

Morallygray: logged off

Callmeemo: hehe

Callmemeo: logged off

7:00 PM:

I'mstillhere: sighed on

Stalkmestalkyou: sighed on

Wheres1My2Toe?3: sighed on

Wheres1My2Toe?3: Hello? Guys you on?

I'mstillhere: Hey Claire! Long time no chat! How you doing girl?

Stalkmestalkyou: Hey Claire, I miss you. Who are you?

I'mstillhere: Claire's best friend.

Stalkmestalkyou: Oh, I'm her boyfriend.

I'mstillhere: I hope your really not stalking her, I might have to come over there and kick your stalker ass.

Stalkmestalkyou: I-I',m not a stalker, hehe.

Wheres1My2Toe?3: 00

I'mstillhere: See you soon, Claire-bear I have to go and gank your stalker boyfriend.

Wheres1My2Toe?3: 00

Stalkyoustalkme: logged off

I'mstillhere: logged off

Wheres1My2Toe?3: 00

Wheres1My2Toe?3: logged off

10:00 PM:

I'llgogayforsylar: sighed on

Mindreader: sighed on

Mindreader: Mohinder what's with the username, I might get jealous. :(

I'llgogayforsylar changed their username to I'llgogayformatt

I'llgogayformatt: :)

Mindreader: I love you. :)

I'llgogayformatt: I love you, too. kiss

Iseeyou: sighed on

Iseeyou: 00

I'llgogayformatt: Molly?

Mindreader: Oh crap.

Mindreader: logged off

I'llgogayformatt: logged off


End file.
